Thursday 21 April 2011

Petomane

Celebrating 100 years of Petomane:

Petomane: Imperial Blether

Petomane: Victims of Pop and Circumstance

Petomane: Like Shrapnel Shifting

Petomane: God Help Us If There's A War

Petomane: Dad's Army of Lovers

Petomane: The No-Fixed-Abode-Guard

Petomane: Going Against The Groin

Petomane: Growing Old Gratingly

Petomane: Can't Work The Video

Petomane: Puts the Egg Under the Hen

Petomane: Art Pamphleteers

Petomane: No Cure for Cankers

Petomane: Soiling Gift Underwear This Christmas

Petomane: A Kiosk of Sound

Petomane: Pop's Grumbling Appendix

Petomane: What do you get if you put James Joyce, Oscar Wilde and Dylan Moran into a blender? It wouldn't happen. You wouldn't get a blender that big. Well alright some sort industrial blender might fit the bill but then you've got other problems. Joyce and Wilde did cross-over in terms of life-span but they could hardly be called contemporaries and Dylan Moran wasn't born for decades after their deaths. And if you put Moran in a blender with the remains of these two literary giants, well you'd basically have the smoothified remains of Moran and, at best, the skeletal shards of the other two, possibly one or two strands of hair still clinging tenaciously to Joyce's eviscerated skull; if you're lucky and depending on whether the blender is set to chunky or smooth. I think you're going to end up with a ragu-like mixture; with the occasional porridgey lump of literary giant or an above average comedian. What possible use could this cocktail of carnality be to anyone? And how could it possibly be an accurate description of an electric pop-tet. And why are they all Irish anyway, you racist bastard?

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